<-Musings of a Soon-to-be Adult |Main|The International Douchebag Symbol->

Another Fucking Poll!

July 20, 2006 9:47 PM

k, so "fuck" is the best curse word. No surprises. Let's move on.

Ok, first, consider this picture (which I got from the cool and funny blog Confessions of a Litigious Mind):

Now, if you're anything like me, you're thinking "Holy motherfucking shit! There are a lot of douchebags in that picture!" I know, I was blown away by it at first, too. But here's the thing. Using the picture below to identify each specific douchebag, vote on which one you think is the biggest. I know -- it's hard to pick just one, but I have faith in you!


And, PJ, my sincere apologies if any of your relatives are in the picture.

For your further consideration: Kristin informed me (see the comments) that this photo actually sparked one of those crazy internet-wide fads, like the Star Wars Kid. So, I guess that one of the douchebags in the picture (#4) is called Lee Hotti and, as Kristin links, there is a webpage dedicated to him. There, you can find additional pictures of him and his douchebag comrades. This is just amazing! Observing douchebags in their own environment. Now I understand why Jane Goodall spent so much time with the fucking chimpanzees - to get the fuck away from these guys.



11 Comments


Anonymous said:

This is by far one of the hardest decisions in my life. I was so torn between 6 & 7, but then I saw the hand puppets being made by 5, and I had to start all over again. 7's got that "Look at me, I'm the raddest thing this side of New Kids on the Block" expression; 6 looks like he's the younger brother/boy toy of one of the others, complete with way too much man cleavage and not one but two faggish necklaces. 5 has the cigarette hanging lazily from the lip, indicating that if it falls out and burns a hole through the crotch of his pants, it won't matter because his lack of equipment will save the day. And I believe that hand gesture refers to two men kissing (indicated by the thumbs wrapped around one another) while they're buddies watch and paint each other's toenails.

In the end, I have to go with number 6, for the atrocious man-cleave.

July 21, 2006 8:30 AM



Vice said:

That last response was me by the way. Ismael, I resent having to enter my name each time. Sometimes going too hi-tech just pisses people off, Mad-Dog.

July 21, 2006 8:34 AM



tRJ said:

It is so #5. He is like five years older than the other guys. And you know he fancies himself a brawler. When someone makes fun of #6 at a bar, you know #5 is like "Don't sweat it, I got your back, bra."

July 21, 2006 8:42 AM



LawNut said:

I'm going to go with #6. It's the "pendant" around his neck that ups his douchebag factor for me. Also, I don't know if you saw my comment on Dicta's site the other day, but I suggested a little stroll over to www.njguido.com if you want to see more Douchebag-Jersey-Blowback-Hair-Guys. It's one of my guilty pleasures.

July 21, 2006 10:35 AM



kristin said:

The funny doesn't have to end here, folks. Douchebag #4 is named Lee Hotti and HE HAS A WEBSITE. He actually came on a message board I post on once and tried to defend his heinous appearance. It was the most unintentionally hilarious thing I have ever seen.

P.S. He got my vote because I have experienced the douchebag personality, in addition to the mind-boggling wardrobe choices.

July 21, 2006 12:02 PM



X-tina said:

I had to go with no. 8...the up-turned collar, the slighly raised eyebrow, the side profile...it all screamed "yes, i'm hot - wanna lick my hair-gel?" Cockey little bastard! It was a difficult decision between him and nos. 6 & 7 for all the reasons above. But in the end, it was the upturned collar that did it.

July 21, 2006 9:41 PM



Vice said:

Well spotted, X-tina. I didn't even see the upturned collar. Damn, the overall douchebaggery is so overwhelming, you really have to concentrate on searching for those details, otherwise you get a douchebag headache and have to look away.

July 22, 2006 10:43 AM



Utah said:

#5 almost looks like he's flashing two misformed "westsides." I can only figure it stands for his gang "waterwings." Combined with the cigarette, it's a subtle dichotomy: fire and water, living as one.

July 22, 2006 4:14 PM



Anonymous said:

it's so #6...I mean look at him

July 23, 2006 2:04 AM






Jason said:

#8 needs a serious beating, but don't forget #1. Nobody even wants that loudmouth dumbfuck in the photo. What do you suppose he's yelling, "WATERWINGS!!" or just a simple "YEAH!!"?

September 12, 2006 3:16 PM



Leave a comment