Here is No Why

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I Was Just Thinking . . .

January 15, 2007 12:40 PM

've got a bunch of stuff on my mind right now, so this is going to be one of those random posts.

First off, I was reading Althouse today (I don't know why, it's one hell of a crappy blog), and I suddenly realized: I hate coffee shops. I don't necessarily hate the people in the coffee shop, I just hate the coffee shop itself. Althouse posted pictures of herself at one of the coffee shops here in town (she didn't say which one, although it's pretty obvious from the pictures. Still, if she doesn't want to give away which one, I won't, either, out of respect for her), and I have to wonder--why would you ever go to a coffee shop, get coffee, and then sit down? It just doesn't make any sense to me.

The first part that baffles me is the coffee itself. I don't drink coffee. It doesn't wake me up at all, so there's nothing to justify the bad taste. When I wake up in the morning, after the first fifteen minutes or so, I don't have trouble staying awake, so I just don't get the big deal.

But, obviously, I'm in the minority, and that's ok with me. Some people like their coffee. Fine. But, still, why would you, after getting your coffee, hang out in the shop? Yes, some of them have fluffy chairs, but most of the time you're stuck sitting in uncomfortable chairs at tables that are too small. I've done this on several occassions, and the whole time I was thinking "Good fucking crap, this is uncomfortable. Why don't we just go somewhere--my place, your place, anywhere--where we're not surrounded by people and forced to sit in small, uncomfortable wooden chairs." I guess my problem is that, if you're committing to hanging out, why not hang out in a place that has all the comforts of home? Like, say, home?

I guess I just don't get it.

Second, I was driving around the other day listening to one of the rock stations here in town, when the absolute worst Metallica song I've ever heard came on. I found out later, through the help of Wikipedia, that it was the song "Shoot Me Again (I Ain't Dead Yet)" off of St. Anger. Let me just say this: shoot him again. Until he's dead.

The song was fucking bad. It didn't even sound like Metallica. It sounded like Nü Metal(lica). It was just terrible. It just goes to show that Metallica is a bunch of poseurs. Something that should have been obvious after Load.

Third, it's been snowing for a long time. The sky's doing that thing where it's pink because it's reflecting all the city lights. It never got dark tonight, really. It looks like there was an accumulation of a few inches. Maybe enough for sledding. Man, that would be awesome. I love the snow.

Fourth, the internet in my apartment is out right now. I don't know why, but I connected my laptop to my neighbor's unsecured wireless network to see if it was a problem on my end or a more general problem, and it didn't work, either. So, it looks like Charter's broken. Sweet.

Well, it's 4:32am. Maybe I should go to bed . . . .

UPDATE: the internet's fixed.

7 Comments

Santi said:

coffee + coffee shops > you

January 15, 2007 2:06 PM

butterbeanqueen said:

Maybe the chairs are unconfortable because you're so fat..?

January 15, 2007 3:17 PM

Boo-yah said:

Maybe _you_ should learn to spell "uncomfortable"?

January 15, 2007 6:00 PM

morenonesense said:

Why would you go out to bars when you can just drink alcohol at home?

January 15, 2007 6:48 PM

TheExpat said:

Coffee: The Eternal Question. Lots of people I love like to drink coffee. My wife, my mother, my in-laws, and of course me. But then, lots of folks I dislike hang out at coffee shops: wannabe intellectuals, indie kids, medicated ex-cons ranting about how prescription drugs ruined their life, as opposed to their prior indiscretions(yea, Tucson).

So I guess I agree with two things in this post. One, coffee shops suck, and two, at this stage in their careers, Metallica sucks even worse. Maybe they should open a coffee shop to improve their image.

January 15, 2007 10:31 PM

Ismael Tapia II said:

Mr. nononsense,
You make a good point--bars and coffee shops are analagous in some ways. But I think that there are some crucial disanalogies, at least from my perspective. First, as I noted, I don't like coffee very much. That's contrasted with my well-nigh unlimited love of booze. Bars sell alcohol, so I'll go.

But there's an even stronger disanalogy. People, like Ms. Althouse, apparently go to coffee shops to read the newspaper, blog, surf the internet, etc. All things you could do just as well and, in my opinion, more comfortably at home. You don't go to bars to do any of those things. Depending on who you are, you might go to a bar for any number of reasons, including: to see your friends (both the ones you went with and any random ones that might show up), to see the band, to take advantage of the drink specials, to be social generally, to hit on undergrads (in which case you're probably at the KK), to throw up in a bathroom you don't have to clean.

In other words, bars offer things, most notably unpredictable social interaction, that coffee shops don't.

Having said all of that, though, if I know who I'm going to be hanging out with, and there's little or no chance of running into people I'm not with, I'll almost always prefer to drink at someone's place than go to a bar.

January 15, 2007 11:02 PM

Dee said:

I totally agree with you about coffee houses--unless there is live music i really never enjoyed hanging out. but they are way better in taiwan, at least at the fancier places. your seat is comfy, and they serve your coffee in a pretty cup and saucer. you could drink it with your pinky extended. in your skirt. it would be exquisite.

January 15, 2007 11:52 PM