I'm Not Usually Like This

April 5, 2007 9:14 AM

've been thinking a lot lately about what the hell's been going on with me. And I think I finally came up with an explanation.

I've been in Florida for several days now. Usually, when I leave Madison, I leave Smash and Lily in the apartment and someone agrees to come feed them every day. As a result, I usually worry: what if something happened during the night, like with Buttercup; what if there's not enough water; what if the cats are just really, really bored? This time, however, they're in someone else's apartment and, while that means I've got a few other things to worry about, I know that my apartment is completely cool.

There's also nothing particularly valuable in my apartment. The most valuable things are my guitars, but even they are worth only about $600-$700. They're not worth breaking into my apartment for. And even if someone does break in, there's not much they can steal, there's not much they can disturb, and it's not like my cats'll get out of the apartment and run away, never to be seen again.

As a consequence of all these things, I haven't thought about whether things are ok with my apartment all break. But things would be different if, for example, L-Dawg and I had just robbed $4 million from a bank and we were stashing it all in my apartment. On the one hand, I'd be worried that someone would steal our money and that I had done all that hard work and would have nothing to show for it. Of course, I'd also be worried that the authorities would catch on to us and that I'd return to Madison, open my door, and have the FBI pointing a gun at my face and telling me to get down on my hands and knees.

My point is that, when there's nothing to lose, I don't worry as much because there's not as much to worry about. When there's a lot at stake--such as an apartment full of cash (or something equally valuable)--I worry way too much, apparently.

1 Comments

SmaSh_ndLilLy!!@ said:

You fuck, get back here and clean our litter box!

April 6, 2007 12:53 AM

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