Here is No Why

I Hate Best Buy

August 31, 2007 6:06 PM

ending out resumes requires printing resumes. Since my printer was out of ink, it was therefore time to get more ink. That's simple enough, but it was still frustrating as all hell to get it done.

The first problem was that I have a photo printer. Although my resume, cover letter, and writing sample are all completely in black, my printer refused to print anything at all because it said that it was out of several shades of color ink. I didn't see how that mattered, but the fucking thing refused to print. I had several extra cartridges of ink here, so I replaced all but two of them. Still, the printer said it was out of cyan and continued to refuse to print. So I called up Best Buy and, after getting through their infuriating menu,* I was able to talk to someone. I told him that I wanted new ink for my printer but that I didn't want to buy a whole set of ink cartridges because I just wanted one specific color, so I asked if they sold the cartridges individually. I told him what kind of printer I had, and he responded that the best thing for me to do was to look up whether that was available online. "What the fuck," I thought, "you're actually in the store I'm asking a question about right now. Why should I go to some webpage when you could just check yourself?" I said something mildly rude and he was able to tell me that they had what I wanted.

So I went down there, bought the cartridge, brought it home, put it in the printer, and tried to print. But now the printer was telling me that it couldn't print because it was out of magenta ink. "Why the fuck didn't you tell me that before," I thought. Having no other option, I went back to Best Buy for the second time in twenty minutes. I got the ink and then got in line. And that's when the stupidest part of my whole day happened.

The guy in front of me in line was this stupid-looking undergrad. He was buying two DVDs and what looked like some computer speakers. The computer speaker box was a little wider and longer than the DVDs, but clearly much deeper. The sales clerk put the DVDs in a box, and then, while literally looking directly behind himself, tried to put the box into the bag, which was clearly way too fucking small. The whole time, the clerk is talking to another clerk and literally has his head turned completely around so that he's not looking at what he's doing at all. Eventually, he looks down and realizes that the box isn't going to fit, so he rotates it, looks away, and tries again. Finally, he's stretched the plastic bag out and about half of the box is in the bag, with the DVDs hanging out at the bottom of the bag. He picks up the bag and the handle rips off (because he stretched it so goddamned much). His solution? Try again with a different bag of the exact same size! So he takes the box out of the bag, wraps the bag around the DVDs that are still inside it, puts the DVDs and the first bag inside a second bag, and starts the whole process over again. Eventually, he understands that it's not going to happen, so he says "sorry, it's not going to fit in the bag." To which the customer responds "do you have a bigger bag?" "No," the clerk says. Here's my internal monologue:

Christ, I can't believe I'm back here. Thank god, there's only one guy at this line, and he's only buying three things. Ugh, come on, let's hurry this up. Dude, why are you trying to put that box in the bag? It's clearly not going to fit. Dude, look at what you're doing! What the fuck? Oh yeah, rotating it will make it all better. Of course. God, you're a fucking idiot. Of course the handle ripped off, you fucking moron. Now what the fuck are you doing? If you couldn't fit it in the first bag, why the fuck would it fit in this one? What the fuck is wrong with you? How fucking long is this going to take? What do you mean "do you have a bigger bag?" Just carry the fucking box! Or--here's a thought--put it in your giant empty backpack! What the fuck is wrong with everyone?! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! [mind explodes]

*Why does a local store even need to have a voice-activated menu system? Those are the fucking worst because they don't work half the time, and the fake voices are always infuriating--like the HAL 9000 or something. Still, thanks to X-tina, I know how to beat them: you almost always get redirected to a live human being if, when prompted for a spoken answer, you respond with a loud curse word. Sweet.

3 Comments

jose said:

Go to one of the ink cartridge remanufacturers in town such as caboodle. They will buy your old ones and sell you new ones at a steap discount and only the ones you need. They are never busy and actually know what they are doing. I've found the quality to be supurb.

August 31, 2007 10:27 PM

TheExpat said:

Best Buy does indeed suck, and kids are rude and stupid, and don't know how to keep customers happy, mostly because they too are treated like shit and make diddley squat for a living. This is still no excuse. If you take the job, you have to take most of the shit.

I've found that commission-based sales people (while more vulture-like, for certain) actually pay attention to you and help you once they know you want to buy something. Whenever going to Comp USA, I've never had to worry about somebody putting some ridonkulous conversation over a customer. In fact it's the opposite. They lie in wait, stalking the aisles, sniffing the air for fools and their money. But at least they pay attention.

Also, the whole "out of ink" scam for personal printers pisses me off too. There must be a way to bypass that problem. If there isn't, then you need to lead the class action lawsuit against these mofos and get us all some free ink.

August 31, 2007 11:29 PM

RPM said:

That phone trick is awesome. I must swear more often. Thanks X-tina.

September 3, 2007 11:10 AM