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Why the Fuck Is There a Song Called "Radar Love"?

August 5, 2007 4:44 PM

was driving around this afternoon listening to the local classic-rock station, The Lake. They usually stick to the pretty standard classic-rock stuff: the Beatles, the Stones, Hendrix, Led Zeppelin--that kind of stuff. It's usually pretty good, although they sometimes play some unmitigated crap--seriously, who the fuck likes progressive rock bullshit?

Anyway, "Radar Love" came on. And I thought to myself "why the fuck does this sone exist?" It's such a terrible song!

First of all, I hate call-and-response arrangements. If you can't come up with a better idea than to constantly switch back and forth between stupid lyrics and half-assed guitar parts, don't even try to write a song. I hate call and response in all its forms: I hate it in vocals (a notable exception being the scene in The Blue Brothers where Cab Calloway performs "Minnie the Moocher"--that's just awesome) and hate it when it's, as in "Radar Love," between vocals and instruments (that's one of the reasons I hate Stevie Ray Vaughn). I find it less irritating when it's exclusively between instruments, but I still think it's really fucking lazy songwritting.

Second, if you're going to include a musical interlude of some sort, make it interesting--nothing ruins a song like a groove-killing interlude. I hate "Magic Carpet Ride" for this exact reason--why the fuck do stupid organs and shit take over the song halfway through? Anyway, "Radar Love" is no better. Almost half of it is devoted to some ridiculous, pointless, boring interlude that does nothing more than make the song long enough to be a single. It's sad.

Third, the guitar work is laughable. Seriously, all of the guitar parts are simplistic, unoriginal, and stupid. The same can be said for the drums, the bass, the singing, and the lyrics themselves. It's just a stupid, unoriginal song.

Fourth, it sounds like something Jet would record. I don't think I've mentioned this on here before, but I fucking hate Jet. They're terrible in every single way. If I ever run into the assholes from Jet in a dark alley, I will kill them by any means necessary.

So, anyway. "Radar Love" sucks. It's no "Mexican Radio," that's for sure.



6 Comments


dee said:

well, what can you expect from a band called "the golden earring"? i share your jet-joathing. every time i see a picture of the singer, i feel like i can see the words "punch me" written across his douchey face.

August 6, 2007 3:22 AM



TheExpat said:

I like Tears for Fears, Yes and a few other prog-rock bands, but not enough to hear their one 'hit song' over and over again over the course of my adulthood. The problem here isn't Golden Earring, it's classic rock radio. It sucks. Everytime you tune in - no matter where - it's always the same latter day Zep, Super Tramp, Eagles, Skynnyrd bullshit. Ghah.

Yes, and Jet is pretty lame, too.

August 6, 2007 6:36 AM



Utah said:

Well, you've managed to insult a song that I happen to love. Everytime it comes on in my car, I slam the wheel with my open palms in an open display of appreciation. Also, I like Jet.

August 6, 2007 5:38 PM



TheExpat said:

Mr. Utah, I myself hold no grudges against Jet fans. It's only that I am partial to Debarge, and Jet is merely the competition.

August 6, 2007 7:26 PM



Ismael Tapia II said:

Dee,
Good point--that's one of the worst band names ever. And, yeah, all the guys from Jet, but especially the singer, are douchebags. And he's not particularly good, either. It's almost as if the band got together and said "Which one of us is the biggest douche? Awesome, you're the singer."

Expat,
Yeah, classic-rock radio sucks hard sometimes, but it's worth it whenever they play some Simon and Garfunkel or Buffalo Springfield. If I hear "Layla" one more time, though--but that's a different rant.

Oh, also, I now agree with The Dude--The Eagles suck.

What the hell is Debarge?

Mr. Utah,
No offense, but, although you are one of my best friends, the fact that you disagree with me about both "Radar Love" and Jet proves beyond any doubt that I am correct to loathe both. You are, after all, the man who thinks that Maroon 5's Songs About Jane was the best album released that year. And you have almost unhealthy love for Five for Fighting.

August 6, 2007 8:03 PM



TheExpat said:

El Debarge is a relic of the jheri curl era (late 70's-early-mid 80's). He had a hit song called, "Rhythm of the Night", the sort of song that if you heard it once, it would forever be tatooed in your memory, and only the buzz of a chainsaw on your temple and the sweet promise of death could erase it.

August 8, 2007 8:12 PM



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