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That's Cool--I Don't Know How to Raise Kids, Anyway

November 29, 2007 5:32 AM

Massachusetts state legislator has introduced a bill that would make it illegal for parents to spank or otherwise physically discipline their children. This, frankly, is astounding--I can't believe that someone would actually think that it is an appropriate use of the State's power to tell parents how to raise their children.

I can think of few things that are more personal and private than the decisions a parent makes about how to raise children. I can't imagine that any parent would claim that anyone other than their children are more important or that any relationship is more important. If we parents can't impart their beliefs, experiences, and values on their children, then we might as well ship children off to be raised in state-sponsored nurseries at birth. Whether you're a an atheist that wants your child omitted from reciting the Pledge of Allegiance, a Jew who cannot allow your son to go to school on Yom Kippur, a carpenter who wants his son to take over the family business, an evolutionary biologist who doesn't want his daughter's mind filled with Intelligent Design nonsense, or a hunter who wants to teach his kid how to hold a gun, it is your right to teach your child your values and your beliefs. That right is fundamental to a free society. Courts have recognized this fact--they have routinely held that parents have almost unlimited discretion to control their children's upbringing. Just as important as the right to teach your child what you want, however, is the right to teach them how you want. To say otherwise is to accept the premise that the government knows what's better for a child than the child's parents. Sometimes, that premise is true. Most of the time, however, the parent knows exactly how to respond appropriately--and the government should recognize that and accept that.

There are undoubtedly cases in which parents cross the line separating discipline and abuse. But physical contact is neither sufficient nor necessary for a parent's actions to be abuse. My mom spanked me when I was a kid. She never did it out of anger, and she never did it for simple mistakes or accidents. When I got spanked, I deserved it. I never got the impression that she enjoyed doing it or that she was doing it for any reason other than to teach me a lesson. No matter what I may have said at the time, I could not justifiably characterize any of those spankings as child abuse. On the other hand, there are countless children who really are being abused, even if their parents have never laid a hand on them. Fortunately, we already have laws that cover most--if not all--of the different kinds of ways a parent can abuse their child. We don't need another one.

The fact that there are people who support laws like this actually scares me. The logical conclusion of this kind of thinking is that every new parent should get a brochure with government-approved disciplinary methods.

It's fucking absurd.



2 Comments


tRJ said:

As a kid who was not only spanked, but lashed and paddled (even at school!), I say this is silly. Some kids simply don't respond to time out, or verbal reprimands, or whatever other touchy-feely punishments parents come up with.

When I raised hell, the only thing that truly scared me was, "You wait 'til your father gets home." That meant the belt, and the belt hurt like no other. It only took a couple encounters for me to get my act together.

It took my brother a little longer. He actually got bitch-slapped by my mother as recently as age 17. And he totally had it coming. And he hasn't called her a bitch since.

November 29, 2007 4:03 PM



TheExpat said:

I don't like this nanny state mentality the northeast US keeps pumping out. If someone wants to eat trans-fatty foods and spank their kids when they need to be spanked, then I say right on, and pass the mofo gravy.

November 29, 2007 11:19 PM



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