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Much Ado About Hair

April 13, 2008 11:02 PM

don't know what it is, but I am strangely compelled to attempt to grow facial hair. I'm thinking something like a goatee so that I look like an evil alternate-universe version of myself. Or maybe a full-on beard so that I look like some sort of mountain man.

Actually, no, I would look like an even bigger idiot than I do now, and that would be bad. What I actually need to do is get rid of hair, by which I mean that I need a haircut.

For some reason, I've always, always hated getting haircuts. I don't hate it as much as going to the dentist, but I hate it a lot anyway. I think I dislike it so much for the same reason that I hate going shopping for new clothes: I don't have a clear idea of what I want and I don't like anything I see, so I just get frustrated with the whole thing.

I mean, my hair is pretty long now--about six inches or so. And it looks really decent some days. But then on other days, it just sort of looks like I allowed my cats to have their way with my head and then just left the house. And the back is definitely far too long--my fucking hair billows over my collar now, which is never good. So a haircut is definitely in order. But what should I do?

I could shave my head, but I love how curly it is. So I could just make it short, but then it just looks so blah--like I've got no personality at all.

I don't know, man, I wish someone would just make these sorts of decisions for me.



3 Comments


Santi said:

The answer is simple: faux-hawk.

April 13, 2008 11:28 PM



TheExpat said:

I hate getting haircuts too, mostly because I'm too lazy to go do it. Only problem is, I have a funny-shaped head, so I can't just shave it all off.

April 13, 2008 11:29 PM



frank x. said:

The answer is even easier than Santi said. Just find a barber, not a stylist. You sit in the barber chair, they ask "Shorten it up for you?", you say, "not too much", and then they give you a hair cut. No details. No asking you what number you want on the clippers. Just a haircut. But you have to make sure it is a real barber shop or else this won't work.

April 14, 2008 9:03 AM



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