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Band Update

July 30, 2008 11:36 PM

o, as I said, tRJ and I are making a semiserious effort to start a band. By that I mean that we posted an ad on Craiglist looking for a drummer and a bassist. We got some responses, but haven't played with any of them because, well, they all suck.

First there was this drummer guy who said he was into what we were into. So we sent him a very rough demo of a song we worked on together. He wrote back that he thought he liked it and that he thought it would work really well as a funk song. I have no interest in ever playing a funk song ever. And, as far as I know, tRJ doesn't, either. In fact, I hope he doesn't because, if he does, he's out of the band.

Then there was a drummer and bassist who knew each other and had played in a band together before. The problem was that their previous band sucked the fat cock. Don't believe me? Check them out yourself. My favorite is "The 420 Song" which features such amazing lyrics as "I get high so I can feel, I get high so I can deal." But they said they didn't write the lyrics and they thought they were lame, anyway. So we e-mailed for a bit and then I never heard from them again.

Then there was this female bassist. Now, this got me really excited. See, some people want to lead a more Christ-like life, but what's really important to me is having a more Corgan-like band. As far as I know, none of Billy Corgan's bands have ever had a male bassist, so I was really excited about the female bassist. Plus then she could sing back up and it would be awesome. But the problem was that it quickly became obvious that she was in high school. That fucking sucks. I mean, I don't know that I'd even know how to talk to someone in high school, and how fucking awkward would it be to meet her family. "Hi, we're two guys in our late twenties. We promise we're not going to rape your daughter. Seriously, we swear." So she's out.

Then there was a drummer who sounded ok. So I called him up. And when I asked him if he could meet on a certain weekend, I just heard him scream "Daaaaaaaaaaaad?!?" I just about hung up the phone right then.

Seriously, people--why is it this hard to find a bassist and a drummer that aren't in high school, that don't like shittastic music, and that are willing to do whatever tRJ and I tell them to? Fucking a, how does anyone start a band ever?


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