Here is No Why

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I Will Never Own a Mac

July 8, 2009 11:36 PM

ucking seriously! I'm using chelsadilla's Mac right now, and this thing makes no goddamned sense.

First off, there's this "Apple" key. The Apple key does everything you would expect the control key to do. So, if I want to open a new tab in Firefox, it's not "ctrl+T," it's "Apple+T." If I want to copy and paste something--and yes, this computer actually does have copy and paste, so I guess Apple is aware that it's a thing that you can have machines do--it's not "ctrl+C" and "ctrl+P," it's "Apple+C" and "Apple+P."

So then you'd think "Ok, if there's this whole other button that does what the control button does, then they got rid of the control key." And if you thought that, you'd be reasonable. But no! The control key is still there for some reason. I have yet to figure out what function, if any, it serves. Why are they both there? I have no idea!

The other major problem I have with the keyboard is that the backspace and delete keys are the same, but you have to push the control key to switch back and forth. Why the control key and not the Apple key, when the Apple key is what you use for everything else and "Apple+delete" does nothing? I DON'T KNOW!

The OS is also infuriating. If I want to make a window take up the whole screen, I have to click and drag the corner, a much more cumbersome process than just clicking one button. And even after the click-and-drag nonsense, you still end up with a window that only takes up some part of the screen, not all of it.

As near as I can tell, there is no GUI shortcut to close a program. I have to either do several mouse clicks into menus or I have to hit "Apple+Q." WHY?

I know that I don't deal with Macs very often, so maybe this is one of those things where if I just used them more often I would get used to them. I probably would. But I would still think that some of the features--or lack thereof--on the Macs is strange. After using PCs for something like fifteen years, being on a Mac is like being in a bizarro version of the real world. And I don't like bizarro versions of things.

5 Comments

kristin said:

How does that work, since your face *is* a bizarro version of things?

July 9, 2009 7:59 AM

mindy said:

So epic crashes, blue screens of death, stupid updated every 5 minutes virus protection programs, 7 minute boot ups, random and nonsensical lock ups and freezing and the windows operating platform are all better? They weirded me out at first, too. But honestly I've been almost exclusively on Macs for 3 years and all the cash in the world couldn't get me to go back to slow, clunky, inefficient PCs. I think its a comfort zone thing and PCs are just what your used to...I really found it odd that you prefer the PC to the Mac, its just a better, more efficient, faster, less troublesome & far less infuriating OS than Windows...

July 9, 2009 8:15 AM

tRJ said:

People who have all those problems with Windows machines belong on a Mac. A Mac is for people who can't be bothered to learn why their computer behaves the way it does. Sure, they tend to function pretty well; they're a closed system. And that's great, until that system isn't working for you anymore. Then what? New Mac! That's totally more sensible than software updates. Please.

July 9, 2009 8:36 AM

chelsadilla said:

This is such a stupid, silly, pointless thing to get your panties in a bunch about. Who gives a fuck what kind of computer you use as long as you can use it to do what you need to do? I haven't used Windows on a daily basis since I was in high school and things have changed. I'm not familiar with it. I use Windows when I need to for school but use Macs whenever it's possible because I'm more familiar with the current OS. You've never used a Mac; you're not familiar with it. Why all the hate?

July 9, 2009 9:20 AM

Santi said:

Of course this is a silly reply, but my geekiness factor cannot let some of your complaints go unchallenged.

1. Control vs Apple (also known as Command) key: Mac OS X is based on Unix, and one of the most popular applications for those coming from a Unix background is Emacs (an editor). One of the great things about Emacs is the countless keybindings it supports; for example, to delete the rest of the current line you're on, you can just hit Ctrl-k. Most keybindings in Emacs are initiated with Ctrl. The amazing thing is that Mac OS X supports many Emacs keybindings across many applications; this makes typing and writing go by a lot quicker. In fact, these keybindings are supported in all Cocoa-based apps, but not in older Carbon-based ones (oh iTunes, when will you be rewritten in Cocoa?) Having a separate key used for tasks like opening and closing stuff means I can use Ctrl solely to exploit the full power of the supported Emacs keybindings. In fact, it is so useful that I have my Caps Lock behaving as the Ctrl key so that my hand can get to it quicker.

2. Quitting vs Closing: Yes, in Windows when you hit the "close" button, most apps will just fully quit; some can be left running as an icon in the taskbar if that's enabled. However, most apps shouldn't need to be fully exited in Mac OS X. The OS manages memory and resources well enough that most apps can be left running in the background without causing problems. This is good --- then these apps can still do what they need to do behind the scenes, and they're ready at a moment's notice when you need them again. Mac OS X is smart enough to know which apps are okay to leave running and which apps should be fully exited. Hitting "close" on iPhoto, Garageband, or iMovie for example will fully quit the app since these apps are more resources intensive. In a well-designed OS, most apps just simply shouldn't need to be fully exited.

The delete key and ability to maximize are just relics of being used to Windows. With Emacs keybindings there's really no need for a delete key (so then why have one on the keyboard wasting space?), and with Mac OS X remembering the sizes of windows when you open one up again, the ability to maximize is mostly moot. If you really need to, you can create some keyboard shortcut to maximize some stuff (which would be faster than hitting a button). Of course, you could say all of this, including 1 and 2 above, are just personal preferences, but for me, it's the little things like this that make Mac OS X a pleasure to use.

In conclusion, use what works for you. Windows sucks though :p

July 11, 2009 10:45 AM